The Ranting Thread

Lunch with my new friend was a very good idea. She is a very nice person--just confused. Apparently this guy is giving her mixed signals. Whenever a guy is doing that I say RUN! I am a no bullshit kind of girl. Either you like me or you don't. I hope she gets over him but she may not. I will be there if things don't work out like she hopes. It's good to have a female friend in town again.

glad it went well!!!!!!!

glad to hear that Kayenne !

Glad that things worked out, kayanne.

I've noticed that in informercials for cooking appliances, they always have a whole bunch of the cooker cooking lots of stuff all at the same time to show you how short they take. Who buys more than one of those things? What I'd like to see is a whole meal being cooked using only ONE of those suckers and let's see how long that takes, and how good the food tastes when half has already gone cold while waiting for the rest of the portions to cook.

It's 5 in the morning. There's nothing else on TV except news and I'm the latest is lots of people died from tropical storm Agatha in Central America.

kayanne wrote:

Lunch with my new friend was a very good idea. She is a very nice person--just confused. Apparently this guy is giving her mixed signals. Whenever a guy is doing that I say RUN! I am a no bullshit kind of girl. Either you like me or you don't. I hope she gets over him but she may not. I will be there if things don't work out like she hopes. It's good to have a female friend in town again.

Glad you had a good time. Maybe you should get her the book, "He's Just Not That In To You". Sometimes women swear they're getting "mixed signals" when in fact, the signal is that he's toying with you. You're right, she should run and run fast.

Speaking of hanging around a guy who gives "mixed signals" hows that ol' Gerry doing lately?

Ger

Ger,

I haven't heard back from her since we had lunch. I called her and left a message last week and I forwarded her a funny message over the weekend too. I think she works a lot too.

Not sure who is ol' Gerry is? If he is the ex he has been on a trip and I haven't seen him since some of us went on a quick overnight camping trip last weekend. It's made it easy to put some distance between us, which we really needed to do.

I liked the insight you gave about your son on the other thread. That was so right on!

K

Thanks, K. I saw it.

I liked your technique on becoming friends first with a guy before moving in to a one on one relationship with them. I was just wondering if that means platonic until you're a couple? Not trying to get personal, just curious.

My generation viewed friendships between the genders a bit differently. Male/female friendships were rare but not impossible. Sometimes a guy might "hang around" you as a friend up until he crossed the line and was rejected (making a forward pass we used to call it) then, no more friend. They seemed to have an agenda sometimes, like a wolf in sheeps clothing kind of thing.

One friendship with a guy (forensic psychologist) I had was very sexually charged with chemistry off the charts, if that's the proper description for it. We were pretty close friends for over five years. Then we finally gave in to it and it instantly killed the friendship. He had been eluding to me he wanted more and I thought we were starting something new then and we would move in to that next phase of our relationship but he turned cold and never spoke to me again. It was confusing. Maybe it was because I made the move on him first or he had a fear of committment and it all scared him, I don't know. Talk about your "mixed signals"!

I see him on television now and then and that's it. He heads up an organization for Veterans affairs in his spare time and is on the news sometimes.

I've had some bad experiences with men and I'm a fairly smart woman. It's a wonder I don't hate men but I still hold out hope that there are some out there that are good guys. The jury's still out on GB too.

Ger

Guys and girls are both capable of hurting others and being hurt no matter how smart and successful they are. I think you are very smart and the fact that you have had some bad experiences with men doesn't change that.

I think if you were around me in person you would understand. I am very blunt and I don't play games. I have been hurt and have hurt others, too. I grew up and I do my best not to repeat my past mistakes, but I am human and I may screw it up again. So yes, those relationships are totally platonic until we are a couple. Okay, I am a hugger so there may be some hugging but I hug everyone! Even my co-workers!

I believe in a man being a man and a woman being a woman. That's just my life and I don't expect anyone else to feel that way. Unless we are hiking or playing a sport, I am usually in a skirt or dress. I own 10 pairs of pants/jeans, five pairs of shorts but I have 150 dresses/skirts--most I bought at thrift stores and on clearance. I expect the guys to open the doors for me, including car doors. I don't expect them to pay for dinner, especially in a friend situation, but usually they do. I respect their guy instincts to buy dinner. I make sweets for them, often I make dinner for all of us and I go to boring parties as their "date" when they don't have one. Respect is key, also. If you demand respect from them they are going to give it to you or go away and what have you lost? Nothing except for a guy who is not worth your time. In turn, you have to give them respect.

I tried to bring a woman into our group a few years ago. In fact, it was the guy who is now my roommate who pissed her off. We all met at a restaurant/bar and he walked up to her and said, "Let me buy you a drink." He wasn't being overly flirty. She looked at him and said, "I can buy my own damn drink." I of course told him he could buy me as many as he wanted! The guys tried to talk to her, asked her to dance and she was having none of it. She never explained herself.

I don't believe in broad generalizations but for the most part, I have found if you make a man feel like a man he will eat out of your hand and follow you forever. Then it's up to you if you want him to follow you. Never settle! I may find my prince in the nursing home when I am 100 and he is 90. But at least I wouldn't have wasted my life with a frog.

Based on what we read because God knows what the real truth is, I don't think GB has a clue as to what a healthy relationship is. But I could be wrong because it's all speculation. You do seem to read people and situations well at times and I think sometimes you are right on.

>> I may find my prince in the nursing home when I am 100 and he is 90. But at least I wouldn't have wasted my life with a frog.


great attitude, K!!

One of the roomies told me tonight that he has noticed I get nervous around women. He said I act like the geeky girl in high school that wants the cheerleaders to let me in their clique.

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, especially by another woman. Except a pack of women backing up the scorned woman.

I've seen a pack in action. Whoa!

Getting along with men/boys is easy. All you have to do is feed them and agree with them. Getting along with women/girls is tougher. It's a skill. You have to learn what works for you. Each woman has different boundaries and to be friends you have to learn where they are and respect them.

The only way to learn to be comfortable around other women is to keep hanging out with them, WITHOUT MEN around.

This forum is a good place to hang with other women/girls. One of the advantages of hanging out online is that you're out of arm's reach.

Unfortunately, I live with men because for me they are easier--you are right about that. I have a tendency not to agree with them all the time though. They are used to me and my feisty ways!

I am trying to plan a 'girl's night' with some college friends but scheduling is tough!

I don't mess with anyone's man but recently I gave my opinion about a man I thought wasn't right for a friend and she hasn't spoken to me since. That hurt more than any man could!

I did that with a good friend in college. She was mad at me for weeks. Then it passed and she admitted I was right, she knew he wasn't right for her, but she didn't want to face up to it.

Just saw a quote in Reader's Digest:
Grief is the price we pay for love. - Queen Elizabeth II

Sittin here in work with my laptop, as I said we doin a renovation, the pu is closed but the gambling casino is open but gladly I can take my lappy with me....I should be off this week but one of my workin collegs decided to be ill....well she told me already on sunday shes will be ill...she must be a fortune teller...we know she isnt really ill..and she knew I need this holiday..I love such workin collegs but my boss never does anything about her....but I am a fortune teller I know that I have to go to the docs too when shes off lol......

Quote :

Just saw a quote in Reader's Digest:
Grief is the price we pay for love. - Queen Elizabeth II

That is an awesome quote and it really moved me. A few years ago an acquaintance of mine from school lost his young child to cancer. He sent out a letter that said, "love hard" as a reminder of how we should love with all we have. I cross stitch when I have time and I stitched that saying and put it on my wall in my living room. But loving hard does mean you grieve hard. Very thoughtful.

Quote :

I should be off this week but one of my workin collegs decided to be ill....well she told me already on sunday shes will be ill...she must be a fortune teller...we know she isnt really ill..and she knew I need this holiday.

Sorry Andrea--I know you were looking forward to that holiday.

Sometimes, making someone see the truth can cause them to lash out at you. In actuality, they are more angry with themselves.

Ger

Sittin here in work and watchin the workers workin...tonight they are makin the floor and noone should walk over it hahaha...how they gonna get into the little casino where I amsittin...I dont know why the owner isnt closing...

I am only fiery and passionate in the good way. So I don't get it when people have an issue and they don't tell me because they don't want to "upset" me. I am a fixer. I particularly don't like it when it had to do with things that need to be fixed at MY house while I am away.

Even if I get upset, I get over things quickly. I just don't understand why people just can't communicate.

Yeah, trouble in my paradise and I am going out dancing with the ex to blow off some steam. There's a music festival going on here so we should have near empty dance floors.

A friend called me on Friday night asking me if I wanted to do something with her on Saturday. After being strung along all day yesterday and part of the evening, she finally decides she doesn't want to do anything.

So while she got to do what she wanted to do all day, I was stuck in the house waiting to go do something I never got to do.

This is why I've learned it's best to do things by yourself if you ever want to do anything or get anything done.

That bites

sorry DK. that really sucks. i've had people do the same to me and it's really a let down....which is why i try to NEVER go back on my plans!!

I burst a blood vessel in my eye earlier today. I have never had that happen to me in my life! It looks horrible, thank goodness it's in a corner and not in the middle of my eyeball. But still....

I've heard it can take up to 2 weeks to clear up. I sure hope it's cleared up by the time I leave for Vancouver.

Anyone ever had this happen to them and, if so, know of any remedy I can use to help it heal?

ouch...never happened to me, but who knows if it will later on.

How did you do that?

I don't know, I was getting ready, put on my makeup and everything was fine, then I felt like I had something in my eye. I thought maybe it was mascara or something. Then when I checked in the mirror, it was all red.

I read that coughing or sneezing can cause it. Lord knows I've done enough of both these past few weeks, as sick as I've been. Even my gums were bleeding when I got my teeth cleaned the other day. The dental hygienist seemed to think my immunity was really down. Time to consume a bunch of Vitamin C!