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 Holiday laughs

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greyeyegoddess
Permanent Resident of the Home of the Sanely Insane
greyeyegoddess

Number of posts : 5150
Location : Heart of the Bay, CA
Registration date : 2008-10-29

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PostSubject: Holiday laughs   Holiday laughs Icon_minitimeSun Dec 14, 2008 11:01 pm

http://adage.com/brightcove/single.php?bcpid=1370868150&bctid=3130509001
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greyeyegoddess
Permanent Resident of the Home of the Sanely Insane
greyeyegoddess

Number of posts : 5150
Location : Heart of the Bay, CA
Registration date : 2008-10-29

Holiday laughs Empty
PostSubject: Re: Holiday laughs   Holiday laughs Icon_minitimeSat Dec 20, 2008 4:30 pm

HOLIDAY EATING TIPS


1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare. You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do.

This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple, Pumpkin, Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the celebratory calories, but avoid at all cost. I mean have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.
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Birdseed
Elevator Doesn't Go Up to the Top Floor
Birdseed

Number of posts : 493
Location : Abbotsford
Registration date : 2008-10-29

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PostSubject: Re: Holiday laughs   Holiday laughs Icon_minitimeSun Dec 21, 2008 3:12 pm

HAHAHAHAHA!!! Good rules to live by. Razz
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greyeyegoddess
Permanent Resident of the Home of the Sanely Insane
greyeyegoddess

Number of posts : 5150
Location : Heart of the Bay, CA
Registration date : 2008-10-29

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PostSubject: Re: Holiday laughs   Holiday laughs Icon_minitimeMon Dec 22, 2008 2:42 pm

Holiday laughs Touch-my-elf

Holiday laughs Stocking-is-hung

Holiday laughs Candycane

Holiday laughs Mistletoe

Holiday laughs Cookie
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Birdseed
Elevator Doesn't Go Up to the Top Floor
Birdseed

Number of posts : 493
Location : Abbotsford
Registration date : 2008-10-29

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PostSubject: Re: Holiday laughs   Holiday laughs Icon_minitimeTue Dec 23, 2008 11:46 pm

Can I put one of those on a t-shirt and wear it? Laughing

Those are so cool. Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: Holiday laughs   Holiday laughs Icon_minitime

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